Friday, 13 February 2009

Silver Lining

We had an amnio done two weeks ago.

I have been quiet about it because I wasn't sure I would go through with it even as I arrived for the appointment. I know a lot of you advised me not to bother, but in the end I couldn't ignore the fact that IVF clinic recommended it, the doctor who did the NT testing recommended it and my OB recommended it as well.

The full results have come back this week as NORMAL.

The procedure was done at the same ultrasound clinic where the NT testing was done, and by the same doctor who guided us through that. She called us her difficult patients because she knew our IVF history and would have preferred not to do the amnio as well, but she assured us she had performed thousands of these procedures and the clinic's risk ratio for miscarriage was 1 in 250. The procedure itself felt just like a needle prick and nothing more. I had a few little cramps that night but nothing to get hysterical over.

DH and I did a fair amount of soul searching over what we would do with an abnormal result. DH spoke to a friend of his who has a son with Muscular Dystrophy and asked if he knew J had this before he was born would they have continued with the pregnancy, without hesitation he said yes. So again, you might ask, why go through with a risky procedure? I guess the answer lies in my response to the result. The doctor rang me in the morning at work, I was insanely busy that day but as I was preparing to go home I caught a glimpse of my bump in the bathroom mirror and grinned like a fool. I then went out to my husband and promptly burst into tears. "Our baby is okay. Everything is going to be okay." I guess I was holding on to more anxiety than I thought.

I am now 18 weeks. I am hugely, obviously pregnant and my first stretch marks have made their appearance. I could care less - seriously - bring 'em on! I am almost 40 but I am finally pregnant! We are almost half way and I think I can see the silver lining. I am yet to feel any movement, or at least anything that I recognise as movement. I have been told this may occur later for me because the placenta is at the front of the uterus.

Sorry to have gone awol for so long, for some reason I have lost control at work which has thrown everything totally off kilter. I have missed so many of your posts but will do my best to catch up.

Tuesday, 10 February 2009

Fire photo's

Firestorm. What hope did they have?
A volunteer fire fighter cares for a thirsty koala.
The town of Marysville is all but destroyed.

Monday, 9 February 2009

Fire season

It's bushfire season here and my state is on fire. Over 10 major fires are currently burning out of control, over 750 houses have been lost since Saturday afternoon, over 125 people are confirmed dead (and this is mostly just people who've been found on the roads, the task of checking each individual property has only just begun). Entire towns are burnt to the ground, people can't find their families and are not permitted to return to their homes to look for them. The fires are still burning, trees and power lines block the roads. The danger is not over yet.

I live in one of the most fire prone regions of the state. But we are safe. The temperature reached 46 degrees (115F) on Saturday, the wind was so hot and so strong. It was awful. One of the worst fires started less than an hour from here but took off in the opposite direction to us. Given the devastation that has followed, I can't say I'm glad but I guess I can say we are lucky. Today it's about 20 degrees (70F) but still very windy. Still awful. Still on high alert.

In this state you choose whether you want to stay and protect your property or evacuate. You attend community meetings, you write a 'bushfire plan' and lodge it with the local fire brigade, when fire comes you're meant to know what to do - you're meant to be prepared. So many people who stayed with their homes died, so many people who tried to flee died in their cars as the fire overtook them. How can you prepare against 10 years of drought, tinder dry bush, limited water supply, and arsonists with their own sick plans?

DH's mother rang late Saturday afternoon, there was a fire near them, his 75yo father was outside wetting down their timber house with the garden hose. DH and Tiger were ready to go and get them when the wind abated and the threat was gone.

My heart aches for all the people who have lost members of their family, their homes, their animals, their livelihoods, their sense of security and peace with the world.

Slightly off topic.... When the Screaming Banshee came to collect the kids last night, DH arranged with her to pick up Tiger the next day to see the chiro.practor about his sore back. The Banshee responded by saying that Tiger had better be nice to her, she's had a terrible weekend because she knows someone who knows someone who lost their home in the fires. She is the most infuriating person I have ever met! I don't know anyone else who could manage to turn a national disaster into a drama all about her!

Thursday, 5 February 2009

Out of the Closet

2nd Trimester - I puffy heart you!

Feeling good at last! The headaches have gone, I no longer feel that urgent need to eat every 10 minutes and I can stay up later than 8pm most nights. My skin is clearer than it has been for ages, my already thick hair is even thicker and my finger nails are growing much faster than usual. My friend tells me all these things mean I am having a boy. Her theory is that boys make you look radiant and beautiful while girls steal your beauty leaving you looking wasted. Hmmm interesting theory.... it's funny that everyone has an opinion or a theory don't they?

We have started telling people. I was hoping to wait until after my next scan at 16 weeks, but I'm too fat to disguise anymore. Even strangers are starting to look at my belly. One of the girls at work came straight out and asked me today, and I'm pretty sure the others have guessed. I had almost the whole office looking for my missing car keys yesterday only to find them next to my computer hidden under just one measly piece of paper. My brain seems to have left me, my memory has gone and I keep doing completely ridiculous things. I'm told this will only get worse. Good thing DH has found a replacement for me already.

DH told the kids this week too. Everyone's initial reaction was WHOA! The boys seemed pretty excited, which I kind of expected because they both love babies. Rosie was the one I was concerned about. She said to her dad "But I won't be your baby anymore", which tugged on the heartstrings a little. But she gave me a big hug and told me I'll make a great mum which was sweet of her. She told me later that she thinks she'll be really jealous of the baby because it will have a good mum while she's got a shit one. I said you never know I may end up exactly the same as her mum. She gave me that sideways look that only teenage girls can give and said I don't think so. (I need to do a whole post about Rosie soon. Poor thing, who'd want to be 14 these days?)

Speaking of the Screaming Banshee, we have not heard of any reaction from her so far. She didn't cope well with news of our wedding, so I'm not sure how this will go over. The bitch in me can't wait until she finds out the baby is due on her birthday!

Ha, this pregnancy may have robbed me of my intellect, but my inner bitch lives on!! I think I'll be okay after all... ;)